A few weeks ago I was having a discussion with a guy friend about being single. We discussed why I was single and he asked me a question, “Have you taken personal inventory?” Just to make sure we were on the same page, I asked, “In what way?” He went on to explain that it was important for me to assess the qualities I am looking for in my dream man and gauge the overlap between who I am and what he wants. Simply stated, am I his prototype?
Any thriving business knows it takes more than a great product to boost sales. It also takes that business understanding the needs of their consumer. What are their wants, needs and desires? How will they benefit from using the product? Why should the product become an intimate part of their lives? Similarly, when we think about the type of partner we are looking to attract, we have to think about what are their wants, needs and desires? How will they benefit from being with us? Why should we become an intimate part of their lives?
For example, a man who travels often for business may be looking for a woman who is able to provide a peaceful and stationary sanctuary when he comes home. Or a woman who is very ambitious in her career may be looking for a man who is perfectly content in his current position and doesn’t mind managing household duties and taking care of the kids. As important as it is to partner with someone who accepts you for who you are. It is also important to ask yourself, will the type of partner you are looking for also find you acceptable? If this is not the case, then maybe it’s time to reevaluate the type of partner you are looking to attract. It could also mean you may want to improve the way you present these pleasing traits to the people you are dating.
This doesn’t have to be a guessing game. If you already have friends or colleagues who exhibit the type of characteristics you find desirable in a potential partner, you can ask them what traits they find desirable in a mate and how are these traits displayed? Once you meet someone you think could become a potential partner you should ask them these questions directly. Asking these questions will give you a precise indication if the “goods” you are selling are the ones your targeted suitors want to buy and give you the ability to adjust accordingly.
Do you know if you are your dream mate’s prototype? If so, how were you able to discover this?
Photo: Coriolinus/ Flickr