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Where Are My Dates??

  • August 3, 2012 at 9:00 am

Dear Lasana,

I joined POF about 3 weeks ago. Since then about 70 girls have viewed my profile, only about 7 girls wrote, none turned into a date.  The girls I fall head over heals for don’t write  nor respond!


Outdoor Comforts


Dear Outdoor Comforts,

Thanks for reaching out. I can understand how frustrating it must feel to not get a bigger reaction from your profile.

In your email you wrote that 7 women did respond. Why did a date not result with any of these women? Did you respond back to them? I also read that 70 women viewed your profile. Did you respond to any of them? Did you email any other women on POF who you found interesting? Women appreciate it when a man contacts them first whether it’s online or otherwise.

I would also suggest you review your POF profile. Is your profile picture flattering? What are you saying on your profile that is attractive to women? Read my blog here to see if you have a “winning” online profile:

Finally, what type of relationship are you looking for? A woman to date? Hook Up with? Or serious relationship? E-Harmony recently released stats stating that 236 members get married everyday after being matched on their site. also released stats stating 12 couples get engaged or married on their site everyday. So if you’re looking for a long-term or more seriously committed relationship, I would recommend you investing the money and trying one of these sites instead.

Wishing you the best in Love and Life,


Hiii, well since our last email I made several changes to my profile and images.  I put up 6 images in different attire: business casual, bathing suit, suit & tie, shirt off e.t.c.  I also made sure that I put neat borders around each image and effects like black and white to make the images more dramatic.
For my profile: instead of saying what i am, i demonstrated it…instead of saying “im witty, and clever, passionate and charming.”
I said “im the guy who when you ask for coffee will automatically tell you, “”only if you stir it with your finger so its sweet”"
I made sure it was clear what I wanted, to save time and not have useless coversations.
Since then my response rate has doubled, and I am getting much more opportunity to meet, and talk with the girls I like best.


Outdoor Comforts

5 Tips for a Winning Online Dating Profile

  • April 22, 2011 at 5:30 am

Last week when interviewed on the BLAKstar radio show, I was asked about my dating tips for 2011. These tips can be found in my blog, Summer Lovin’. This week I wanted to explore what seems to be the most challenging tip, joining an online dating website. What is it about joining a dating website that makes so many people cringe? According to recent studies, 1 in 5 new relationships now begin on an online dating website. I personally know many friends who have met quality partners and even got married to someone they met from an online website. Although it’s no longer taboo to place our picture on a site to meet new people, I believe what worries people the most about online dating is creating the profile. Many people don’t know where to begin. What type of pictures should be used? What should the profile say? How does one attract the right partner? What does one do to attract the right partner?

Here are 5 tips on how to create a winning online dating profile:

1.       Display Smiling Photos

Showcase photos in which you are smiling and/or doing a fun activity on your profile. These types of photos will make you appear more approachable, friendly, and fun. You should be alone in these pictures as this profile is about showcasing you. Also make sure to share at least 3-4 photos on your profile.

2.       Have a Fun Heading

Besides the photo, the heading is the next thing a person usually sees before opening your profile. It should be a fun statement that piques their interest. An eye catching heading could be a favorite saying, motto or phrase. Just make sure that it says something positive about you.

3.       Paint a Picture

Your profile says a lot about you. Therefore share your best attributes. But to really make your profile stand out from the thousands of others on the site, don’t just write them out. Paint a picture. For example, if you are a caring person, instead of simply writing that, share an example of how you volunteer at an animal shelter on Sundays or how you spent many years of your life as a caretaker. This will not only make you seem more real than just words on a profile, but will give the person reading it something to connect with.

4.       Create a Vision of Love

This is the most imaginative part of creating your dating profile. What is your love vision? What would your partner be like? What types of activities would you do together? How would he/she treat you? Craft a brief paragraph and describe this at the end of your profile so you can attract your ideal mate.

5.       Be Honest

The entire reason you are creating this online dating profile is to meet someone you are compatible with. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Being honest on your profile is the best way to attract someone who you may build a lifelong love connection with.

Although I have shared these 5 tips with you, I know there are still many of you who find the entire process of creating an online dating profile overwhelming or are simply too busy to create one. In fact, I recently gained a client who wanted to use my services to create her profile. If you are also interested in this service, e-mail me at The first 10 people who e-mail me will get an initial online dating profile setup for only $50 (a savings of $25).

Do you have any successful online dating stories? What suggestions do you have for people creating an online dating profile?

Photo: Ed Yourdon/ Flickr